Wednesday, June 18, 2014
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
Life Lessons By Beth
When the weather is absolutely perfect, the first thing that I think of is the warm summer days and nights out on my family boat on the Mississippi river. Growing up, I spent many hours sitting on the bow of the boat and enjoying all Mother Nature had to offer...
I casually mentioned this at dinner with my old Girl Scout troop last night, and my friend Beth immediately went to her favorite boat memory: Flirt Fest 1995.
The basic outline of the story is this: Two sixteen year old girls. Five 18 year old boys that were friends with my brother. Hormones. Parents are present, so harmless flirtation ensues.
It was probably the first time Beth had ever been flirted with by more than one person. Five at a time? It's like an epic tale of wonder. Mention the boat to Beth, and she goes straight down memory lane to that day.
So here we are at dinner, 3 aging Girl Scouts and their mothers, and bell rings in Beth's brain when I mention the boat. She grabs my should and starts laughing, "Do you remember Flirt Fest!?"
I joke with her, "You'll never let me forget it!"
And without hesitation, she guilelessly answers "How could I ever forget it? It was the day I learned about the power of boobs."
And wouldn't you know? I have photo evidence of this life lesson being learned:
I casually mentioned this at dinner with my old Girl Scout troop last night, and my friend Beth immediately went to her favorite boat memory: Flirt Fest 1995.
The basic outline of the story is this: Two sixteen year old girls. Five 18 year old boys that were friends with my brother. Hormones. Parents are present, so harmless flirtation ensues.
It was probably the first time Beth had ever been flirted with by more than one person. Five at a time? It's like an epic tale of wonder. Mention the boat to Beth, and she goes straight down memory lane to that day.
So here we are at dinner, 3 aging Girl Scouts and their mothers, and bell rings in Beth's brain when I mention the boat. She grabs my should and starts laughing, "Do you remember Flirt Fest!?"
I joke with her, "You'll never let me forget it!"
And without hesitation, she guilelessly answers "How could I ever forget it? It was the day I learned about the power of boobs."
And wouldn't you know? I have photo evidence of this life lesson being learned:
Monday, June 2, 2014
Helicopter To The Throat!
Walking my dog today I was assaulted by a seed.
A stiff wind... a brittle pod-wing twirling in the wind trying to find a place to take root... sounds charming, doesn't it?
No. This is not a fairy tale.
I'm pretty sure that a certain maple seed had envisioned itself as some sort of ninja throwing star. That thing came hurling at me with INTENT.
I barely had time to comprehend the situation, my brain registering a golden blur in front of me when it slashed at my throat.
Startled, I could not even utter a scream, the stunning sting of the weapon silencing me and sending me into shock.
How could this have happened in my neighborhood? What could motivate this seed to become a killer? Why would the helicopter have chosen me, of all the people it encountered today?
I....really need to stop watching Investigation Discovery shows on Netflix.
A stiff wind... a brittle pod-wing twirling in the wind trying to find a place to take root... sounds charming, doesn't it?
No. This is not a fairy tale.
I'm pretty sure that a certain maple seed had envisioned itself as some sort of ninja throwing star. That thing came hurling at me with INTENT.
I barely had time to comprehend the situation, my brain registering a golden blur in front of me when it slashed at my throat.
Startled, I could not even utter a scream, the stunning sting of the weapon silencing me and sending me into shock.
How could this have happened in my neighborhood? What could motivate this seed to become a killer? Why would the helicopter have chosen me, of all the people it encountered today?
I....really need to stop watching Investigation Discovery shows on Netflix.
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